the "perks" of being the ugly one in the family

you get teased a lot. your self-confidence lowered. you turned anti-social. people judged you hard for being anti-social. even your parents gonna play 'fav child', and obviously you're gonna be the least fav (that is if you're even liked by them).

and they'll pinpoint your hobby (Kpop for me) as to what had made you the black goat of the family.

EXACTLY what I'm experiencing right now.

I dare to say I really hate my mom right now, Idc even if she was the one giving birth to me. she had played 'fav child' on me, and I'm pretty sure she didn't even notice it. ever since my lil sis came home, she only asked for her favor. even only called her to eat meals, like I'm not even exist. HOW AM I NOT FKIN BUTTHURT!

and yet, she blamed my rotten behaviour was all because of me. really??

for me, it had came to the point that I really wish I have a job soon so I can get far away from my family, like, forever.

I still haven't let out all my frustrated feelings. I'm not even in contact with my friends anymore.

perhaps crying to sleep will help.

saying goodbye isn't necessarily hard.

so long, friend of 5 years.

please forget whatever memories we had together, good and bad. please don't try to find out about me from anyone. I'm doing you a favour of removing fake friends in your life.

I am deeply, truly sorry for all the bad things I've done to you and your family. all the bad thoughts I've had on you. intended and unintended. I've reflected on it, without you knowing it.

but, I hope you do realize all your wrongdoings too.

do well in your business. I really hope we don't cross path in the future.

take care.